Visiting, Revisited

A Threnody for Savoir Faire

A fine depiction of a visit complete with one of its staples, a bored misanthrope in the corner reading the newspaper, n/k/a browsing Reddit, TikTok, or Bumble on a smart phone. Country Cousins, Richard Redgrave, c. 1847–48. c/o Tate Images. Creative Commons CC-BY-NC-ND (3.0 Unported).
A typical visit, as imagined by the host.

Visiting was largely a middle-class activity, though I suppose the Great Unwashed shot the shit.

“There are two things in ordinary conversation which ordinary people dislike — information and wit.” — Stephen Leacock, only Canadian asshole, apparently.

How to Not Talk Good

How One May & Ought to Convivially Converse

Ask questions designed to elicit joyful talking from your fellow visitor.

The point of conversation is to learn about others by getting them to talk, not to teach others about yourself by talking.

Aim not only to learn something about your fellow visitor, but to have them learn something about themselves.

Visiting, in reality, today.

I got the savoir faire with the unique rhymin’ / I keep it on and on, it’s never quittin’ time and . . .

— Adam “Ad-Rock” Horowitz

To visit is to create fertile ground for empathy, and, perhaps only coincidentally, that is something largely gone from our culture as well.

It's been a real leisure. [That picture is not me.--ed.]

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